not fumbling as hard

i understand why people make milestones out to be such a big deal. with each one, things get a little bit easier. maybe by just one more minute to breath. it's good news for me, new motherhood has not been very graceful. right now ziya is eating the cardboard off the toilet paper roll, and i'm fine with that. she was working on one side getting it all nice and wet, so i turned it to the other side so she wouldn't bite off that one, but she took it from me and turned it back to the other side. i'm just gonna let her eat that until there are little pieces coming off...

i also let her pull on the blinds. i'm sure these things are some sort of hazard. probably a lot of hazards. whatever. i'm not in the other room while she is eating cardboard and pulling on blinds and juggling knives. i'm doing all those things with her. see, now everything is fine.

her new thing is saying 'bih bih' all the time. we go into the bathroom and she looks in the mirror and starts waving and saying 'bih bih.' i always ask her where she is going, but she never tells. she's just a mystery like that.

i would like to say that she is sleeping really well, because she has been for the past few days, but things will likely change if i bring it up, so i'm not going to say anything at all. nothing...

in the spirit of making fun of myself, i'll just let you know that this post is very appropriately titled considering i started this post at 9 this morning, and i am just now finishing it at 12.17 am. it took me 15 hours to write a paragraph, basically.

sweet. good night!